Not On My Watch

First comes love, then comes marriage, and then the baby in its carriage.

And to answer your question - no, I'm not pregnant.

Nor do I wish to be at this moment.

We have some college friends and know couples that have recently gotten married (or have been married just as long as we have), and BAM!, a few months later, a year later, two years later, they're pregnant. My thought is, what's the rush? I'm going on two years of marriage pretty soon, and I'm pefectly comfortable with my happy, simple, relatively uncomplicated life.

OK, if it's an accident, it happens, you should have at least been a little more careful. It happens. On the other hand, there are couples who REALLY want kids right away. For others, time's-a-ticking. Me? I'll wait a few more years until my life feels a little more stable and secure. Let's just say that when the economy gets a little better, I'll think about it some more. If not by then, then perhaps in about four years from now. Don't quote me on that.

It's not that I hate kids. I just don't want them right now. Maybe it was because of my years of being a summer camp counselor that frustrated me and stressed me out at times. Yes, a little scarred for life. It's no easy task, that's for sure. Maybe I just don't FULLY like kids yet. I like the idea of having them SOMEDAY. And it's not like when I see baby pictures or when I pass by little kids clothes, I don't have my "aww, look how cute!" moment, because trust me, I've had those moments. But then the thought just passes me by instantly as I walk past the kids section and it's as if I'd never had that thought. Maybe it's a good thing.

I don't mind kids - I don't think. I really enjoy playing with my nieces and tickling them like crazy and having a great time - for a few hours. But I think at times I'm thinking of it as a babysitter-type idea. They're OK for a few hours. But a few days (perhaps) or weeks? Thanks, but no thanks. I don't need that kind of drama quite yet.

I'm fairly certain my parents wouldn't mind having another grandchild - there's already three granddaughters in the family; two with hazel eyes, one brown. Maybe my kids will have green eyes (as my husband's family is pretty dominantly a green-eyed family); my family, more of a hazel, brown-eyed family.

And it's not like we're not being cautious, because we are. We're definitely using precautions. But getting pregnant? Not on my watch. I'll get pregnant when the time feels right, when my husband and I feel like we're ready to venture onto this new challenge, when I'm comfortable enough with being a mom and waiting to being called mommy by my child.

But when I do get pregnant, I really want a girl. :)

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